Phallicity

e[lust] #17

2010-07-09T23:22:00.002-04:00

Photo courtesy of Elle from Kink Unleashed

~ Featured Posts (Lilly’s Pick) ~

Why Pride is Still Important - When someone tells me that they don’t think Pride is necessary, I can’t help but believe that they go through life with tunnel vision. I live in New York where for the most part I can walk around being a big ol’ queen and I’ll make it home alive, but there are people who live in places where they can’t. Even here in New York you’ll get called a faggot from time to time by passing cars or groups of punks, and even here in New York I hear stories of people getting the shit kicked out of them just because they were gay.

Fantasies and Condoms - Our culture has created a narrative in which sex only feels good and looks sexy if no one is protected. We’re all suffering from this narrative, but sex workers are probably suffering the most.

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Some days we need a little hope - I encourage you to practice random acts of kindness that could be worthy of inclusion on the site (GivesMeHope.com). Be nice, be caring, let your heart open up just for the sake of bringing someone some happiness or comfort. Do you know how good it feels to just give?

See also: Pleasurists #83 and #84 for all your sex toy review needs.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Kink & Fetish

An Anal Adventure
Bound in the Night
Being a Tart
Danger may explode without warning
Found It: Pearls for the Submissive Wife
Morning Rituals
Shoe Slut
(another!) Shoe Slut
Spanking my ass while fucking so he feels every wiggle
Submission is impossible in the absence of humanity
Strip, boy
Swallow Falls
The Trigger
The Beast with Three Backs

Erotic Writing

A long hot day
And then we kissed...
A Picture of Lust
Ass Plug
'Come For Me...'
Depths
Exchange II
Forbidden Fantasy
Fucking Mika for the first time
Good Things Come To Those Who Wait
Getting Off...On The Road
Katie's First Time
Master Class
My Favourite Waste of Time
Microfantasy Monday, week 84: Addiction
Picture to Word 2
Sociable
Saturday Night Plans
Safe Sex
The Train
Thunderstorms are Sexy
Teaching Respect (Part 1)
You First

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Adventures in Birth Control
Erotic Awakening: A Swinger’s Comments
Friends With Benefits His Lush Behind!
Getting Started - Hotel Parties
Greetings From The Deep End - Swinging and Openness
How To Have Multiple Orgasms
Mr. Strong
Play Safe. Stay Safe. Get Tested. Be Protected.
Political Cuddling: Asking, Talking, Touching
Reflections on Glass
Something I Wish I'd Had 10 Years Ago
Sex: A required part of the college curriculum
Shades of Grey
Three's Company
Ten Life Lessons I’m Learning from Enslavement
Uncomfortable
Walk of Shut The Fuck Up

Sex News, Interviews, Politics and Humor

Interview with Scarlett Chaos aka Essin'Em
The Media is Not Responsible for Your Poor Body Image
To Shave or Not to Shave

The Lady Vera

2010-07-07T19:03:00.001-04:00

The carriage rattled slightly on the broad clay road, his eyes steady on his charge. She appeared perfectly at ease, a sickly bruise marring her otherwise beautiful porcelain face. Black hair, the color of the darkest night, fell in ringlets from her head. Soft sumptuous lips, red as cherry wine. Blue eyes, calm and cool. Her graceful curves were wrapped in silk and adorned by silver and jewels... They looked cheap next to her. She burned with a passion that demanded his attention. She looked perfectly at ease for someone who was waiting to die. They had rode in silence for hours but he could stand it no longer.

"I know of you, Lady Vera, but I cannot make myself believe all the tales about you. Are you not the least bit afraid?"

"Oh? Just which tales do you doubt, ser...?"

"Simon."

"Ser Simon... " She smiled sweetly. "Are they truly so outlandish?" He felt his face heat slightly as his name rolled off her tongue.

"I can't see you beheading the Count of Mandra... or stealing the White Lotus from Queen Iradessa." Her eyes twinkled and the corners of her lips turned up in the slightest of smiles.

"The Count was a great military man, but his weakness has always been women. It was not as difficult as you might think. Sweet 'Dessa was much more of a challenge, but worth the wait. For her and the Lotus both." Her smile blossomed into a lusty grin and I looked away chagrined.

"I wasn't always this... This facade of painted nails and painted face, of silk and lace and pearls. I have been many wonderful and dreadful things in my life... A nervous model, a tavern dancer... a singer, a killer, a whore. I have charmed kings right off their thrones and seduced the very stars themselves. No, I do not fear death. We are old lovers. He's come calling many times and I've proved too hard to get. Like any man, that made him want me all the more."

She eyed me slyly from under her curls. "We have nothing but time. I expect it to take another day at the least to reach the capital. If you would like, I can tell you about the girl called Annabelle Veraline Chambers... before she earned her infamous surname."

I met her eyes, unable to hide my interest. She smiled, for the first time sincere. Her lips moved and time seemed to slip away...

Pleasurists #84

2010-07-01T13:20:00.001-04:00

via Mario M.M.

Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.

Did you miss Pleasurists #83? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #85? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then use our submission form and submit it before Sunday July 4th at 11:59pm PDT.

Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Beat the Heat – Win a Toy Deadline: June 30th.
Win Ophoria K-Balls Deadline: June 30th.
Win An Amazing Hot Heart Massager Deadline: June 30th.
June’s Sexy Contest: Explore Your Fantasies with KinkAcademy & Dr. Ruthie Deadline: June 30th.
Celebrate True’s 3 Years of Wedded Bliss and Get WET! Deadline: June 30th @ 11am Central.
Dangerous Lilly’s Milestone Giveaway Deadline: July 1st.
Two For You Deadline: July 2nd.
Intimate Organics Cleansing Gel and Body Souffle Giveaway Deadline: July 4th.
Sharing the Vamp Love with You Deadline: July 4th.
In Need of a Girl’s Night In? Deadline: July 5th @ 11:59pm Central.
Win a $50 Gift Card to Eden Fantasys! Deadline: July 8th @ 11:59pm Central.
Hot Summer Nights Giveaway Deadline: July 11th.
Lustre Vibe Giveaway! Deadline: July 15th.

Editor’s Pick

Raquel vs. Niagara: The Showdown by Outspoken Clitic

Editor’s Note: The most epic dildofight ever! You know you want to see two pink realistic-feel dildos battling it out set to Ennio Morricone music and wearing black cowboy hats. I mean… come on! What’s not to love? There’s also a review, so be sure to click the link.

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #16

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

Babeland Remote Panty by Shay
Tulip by Mistress Kay
Tulip by Darling Dove
Tulip by Kynky Kytty
Tulip by Gardenvy
Roly Poly by Red Vinyl Kitty
Jimmyjane Iconic Smoothie by Jessie Beth
Ophoria Bliss No. 8 by Luscious Lily
Gino by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
6″ Power Bullet Breeze by Screaming Violet
Fun Factory Delight by Mistress Kay
Extase Liberte by Alan & Michele
Le Reve 3-Speed Bullet by Mistress Kay
Evolved Bet On Black by Red
SinFive Ilo by Carrie Ann
OhMiBod Freestyle by Luvasaurus
Evolved Croupier by Missy

Dildos

Anal Toys

Njoy Pure Plug by buzzvibe
Crystal Delights Plug by Toys in Love
Crystal Delights Plug by Sundae
Ophoria Rapture No. 6 by buzzvibe
Tantus Alumina Revolve by Britni TheVagdeWig
Vibrating Butt Plug by Mystress Lady Evyl
Tantus Infinity Royal by Sammi
Rascal The Inmate by Red
Vixen Creations Tristan by ScottA

Toys for Cocks

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

Wet Naturals Beautifully Bare
Oral Pleasure Lip Gloss by Mistress Kay
Kama Sutra Love Liquid by Cooper
Moist Lube Dispenser by Mistress Kay
Pink Water by Jonsbabydoll
Pink Water by Holly
Sliquid H2O by True Pleasures
Love Essentials Kit by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
Intimate Organics Foot Foreplay Lotion by Vanilla Kinks
Sliquid Swirl Green Apple Tart by Gardenvy
Strawberry Moist by Gardenvy
Wet Pheromone by Gardenvy
Babeland Body Lickable Oil by Sammi
Kama Sutra Body Souffle by Carrie Ann

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult DVDs & Porn

Storage

Miscellaneous

Mystic Wand Attachment by Garnet Joyce
Black Lite Body Paint Kit by Mistress Kay
Cater to Me Kit by Kate
KegelMaster 2000 by Joanna Cake
Sportsheets Hump Bump & Vibe by mina

You sure got a purdy mouth...

2010-06-25T16:33:00.005-04:00

If you've seen my past reviews of the Tenga products, you know how much of a fan I am of their stuff. Not only do they have some premium toys, they also feature some cheaper alternatives for those who want to test the waters. Babeland offered up this awesome masturbation sleeve from Fleshlight and I had to try them out. The Succu Dry is the Sex in a Can model, a smaller version of the bulky fleshlights. It also comes with a smaller price tag. Normal fleshlights run $70-$90 while this amazing piece of work is only $50. Still a bit pricey compared to the sample versions Tenga makes, however, the Tenga Eggs and Onacups are meant to be used once while this blowjob simulator is made of some quality stuff and can be used over and over as long as it's well maintained and cleaned properly.

The Succu Dry is a little over 7 inches tall and for all the world looks like a giant can of beer. The can itself is made of plastic, the sleeve from Fleshlight's patented superskin. The entry point on the sleeve is a pair of succulent looking lips punctuated by pointy vampire teeth. Don't worry, she doesn't bite. On the contrary, she sucks (in a very, very good way). The material is amazing, so soft and smooth. The inside of the sleeve has little nubs (about a quarter of an inch high) throughout the entire length. As wonderful as the superskin feels, it is just one of the great things about this toy.

The name says everything. This toy is all about suction. The cap on the bottom (top when in use) can be unscrewed to adjust the suction of the sleeve. Completely tightened, it is sometimes difficult to enter and I suggest opening it at least halfway to make this a little easier. You'll want to use plenty of lube (water-based only) regardless. After you are firmly inside, tighten the cap all the way and try some slow stroking. I find the most stimulation from completely closed to about a one full turn on the cap. Afterwards, the suction drops significantly. It still feels great, but the way the suction pulls and slides the skin of your penis and slips over the tip is just not the same at that point. Sometimes when you get the suction just right, the way the air slips through the toy causes the material to vibrate slightly and just adds that much more to the experience. Find what works for you and enjoy. The texture is soft and smooth and with the right amount of suction it feels amazing sliding up and down your cock. Like most masturbation sleeves I've used, during my orgasm the textures are just too intense and I can't use the sleeve, basically waiting for the head of my penis to desensitize. That's really the only gripe I have with the toy at all, but it's consistent with any sleeve-type masturbator from my experience.

The material holds up well, I've used my fleshlight about five times now and notice no signs of wear after multiple cleanings. This is one area where the fleshlight can be slightly more demanding. To clean your Sex in a Can, you have to remove the liner and rinse it out by turning it partly inside out. Use warm water and rinse away all the lube and cum (don't use any cleaners or soaps as it may damage your toy!). Afterwards, I normally pat dry with a towel and leave it to finish drying on a towel rack or something similar. Make sure it is COMPLETELY dry before putting it back into it's case. The last thing you want is mildew in your sex toy.

After all is said and done, I'm torn. The fleshlight is not better than my Tenga products, but it is not worse either. I would say they are different sides to a badass coin with two heads. You are bound to win either way. The material, texture, and most notably, the suction of the Succu Dry make it a great choice for a masturbation sleeve and at half the cost of the Tenga Fliphole... it certainly does have its perks.

e[lust] #16

2010-06-25T09:59:00.002-04:00

Photo courtesy of Janie

Welcome to e[lust] - Your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #17? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s sidebar and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~

Sex Pistil’s Guide to Sucking Great Cock - The penis is not something to be feared. It’s not something to hide from, and it’s definitely not something to be put up with the good china and used for special occasions only. The penis is alive and breathing, so to speak, and as such, is not a one-size-fits-all, if-one-guy-likes-it, all-guys-like-it kind of entity.

An Erotic Vignette - “You will come, and when you do, you will yell my name. Because I own you.” “No,” she whispered again, terrified. The last part of herself… total control over her pleasure, the responses of her body… surely he couldn’t… but his eyes said he could.

Dual Erotica: Tahoe – We finally reach our floor and excitement wars with nervousness in my head. After all, it’s been a long, long time for me. I don’t have the body I once had; I’m not nearly as experienced as you are. But there is no turning back, not that I want to

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Does Size Matter? - I am most definitely a size queen when it comes to my sex toys…but there’s a reason for that. Using a dildo is very VERY different from how I get fucked by a guy.

~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~

I Want It All – Gender (identity) is different to (biological) sex. Biologically there are males and females, and those who identify as neither (intersex). But it’s sure as hell not that simple, no matter what society says.

See also: Pleasurists #80 and #81 for all your sex toy review needs.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Along OUR Beating Path
Bringing Sexy Back
Equality
Fear (No Loathing) in Las Vegas
Getting Started in Swinging – Clubs
I’m a woman, and I like porn.
M says I’m a good girl!
Nerves & Dysfunction – Erectile Issues in the Lifestyle
Revelations (Of the Feminist and Slut Kind)
Sex Addiction
Submission is not an excuse to be Spineless!
Semi-Rape – Couldn’t Say No
Toys Vs. Cocks
Transtastic: On Why My Relationships are Queer
Words, Words, Words

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

Sex Ed
The Uncensored Realm of Internet Erotica

Kink & Fetish

67 orgasms will do this to a woman
Bless Me Father… For I Keep Sinning
Carnival
Can I?
Life List: TortureGarden Party…check
Three is a Magic Number – Part 1

Erotic Writing

#8 – Sharing is Caring
Alone
A Gracious Acceptance
disrobing
Erotica: Like This
Gagging her…
Homecoming
I Opened My Eyes
Kiss
Love, Sex And The Snooze-Button
Not Now
Phone Threesome
Remember…?
sex is sex no matter the sex
sexy photoshoot – part II
The Customer
Tall Summer Grass
The cave of unimaginable sincerity and beauty
Very Far from Heaven
Wife swap on holiday
With heels on

A Picture of Lust

2010-06-23T00:05:00.003-04:00

She was stunning.

Her porcelain skin was a sharp contrast to the black sheets. Brown hair in curls, they dangled deliciously down her shoulders like rivulets of rich coffee. Lying on her side, innocently nibbling a single finger, her green eyes watched me watching her. It was hard to stay focused. Still, she was a client and I would not cross that line.

I dipped my brush, studying her skin intently. Mixing and dabbing, I quickly came to the tint I wanted and made several shades across my palette. I started at her shoulder, like a lover kissing that soft curve. My brush an extension of my hand, her flesh blossomed onto the canvas under me. The arch of her neck and the subtle grace of her jawline. Her sumptuous lips, a deep red that spoke of lust and passion. That tangle of brown, thick and full... those deep emerald oceans, drawing me in... I lost myself for a few moments, simply gazing at her, wanting her, needing her.

The brush nearly slipped from my fingers and I caught myself. I shook my head to clear my thoughts and focused again. A lighter shade now, some here, some there.. blending to get the shadows and depth of her cleavage, her full breasts becoming softer beneath my hands. I traced those curves, trying to do her justice, to lock in the lust I felt on canvas. I moved lower, the graceful curve of her waist, the rise and fall of her hips. Her other arm was stretched between her legs, her hand covering her pussy. No, not covering.

Rubbing.

My already hard cock throbbed inside my pants. Her hand moved slowly, almost as if I were imagining it. Her fingers glistened slightly and the faintest bit of color was in her pale cheeks. I steadied myself with a breath and continued. Focusing intently on her hand, though impossible to capture that wicked motion that taunted and tempted me, I put what I could on canvas. Her arm stretched as if reaching for a lover, fingers massaging the pink folds of her dripping cunt. I added color to her cheeks and a little sheen to her skin as she began to sweat. I fleshed out her thighs, smooth, luscious, inviting. The curve of her calves and ankles, her feet lost in the tangle of sheets.

Finished with the wondrous and agonizing task of painting her, I breezed through the sheets, only half looking at the canvas as her hand began rubbing more rapidly, her hips moving slightly with the effort. She was breathing louder, heavier, a panting. I signed the bottom of the painting and watched intently, my cock almost painfully throbbing now. Her voice rose and she lost the pose, her neck and back arching as she moaned in release.

"Are you done?" Her voice seemed slightly annoyed.

"What?" I jumped slightly and looked away, startled at the sudden change.

She was sitting up, legs crossed. I looked back at the painting, it's canvas only half done and a distinctly vivid error where my brush had wandered in my now obvious reverie.

"No, I'm sorry. Can you give me a moment? I need a short break."

She looked even more annoyed. That was fine. I went to the bathroom and finished my fantasy and came in that pouty little mouth.

Pleasurists #82

2010-06-20T11:04:00.001-04:00

via Viviennui

Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.

Did you miss Pleasurists #81? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #83? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then use our submission form and submit it before Sunday June 20th at 11:59pm PDT.

Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

Who’s Your Daddy Fathers Day Giveaway! Deadline: June 19th.
Giveaway: Woodgasm Deadline: June 20th @ 11:59pm Pacific.
Fuck Sleep Pillowcase Giveaway Deadline: June 26th.
Win Ophoria K-Balls Deadline: June 30th.
Win An Amazing Hot Heart Massager Deadline: June 30th.
June’s Sexy Contest: Explore Your Fantasies with KinkAcademy & Dr. Ruthie Deadline: June 30th.
Celebrate True’s 3 Years of Wedded Bliss and Get WET! Deadline: June 30th @ 11am Central.
Win a $50 Gift Card to Eden Fantasys! Deadline: July 8th @ 11:59pm Central.

Editor’s Pick

Pirates Pendant Vibe by OnIntimacy

I was skeptical. I like my bullet vibes, but rarely happen upon an occasion in which it would be helpful to have one disguised as jewelry. I had a lipstick vibe once in college. I left it in my boyfriend’s dorm and one of his unsuspecting housemates wanted to see what color lipstick I wore. Long story short, we had trouble making eye contact with each other for a while.

Note: I read enough (read: so many) reviews every week to know it’s the little things that really make a review, add that little something extra and it will make your review stand out, and that’s how this one is. What really tipped me over the edge was the corny joke embedded in the image captions and a link to the Top 10 Pirate Pick-up Lines. You know you want to go look.

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #15

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

Dahlia Breeze by Lila
Evolved Roulette by Payton
Sqweel by Beautiful Dreamer
California Exotics Lia by Sammi
Bswish Bcurious by Mistress Kay
We Vibe by la petite devergondee
Hi-Tech Bullet Collection by Sammi
Eroscillator Top Deluxe by Splendwhore
LELO Liv by Kaijah
Pirates Pendant by OnIntimacy
Pirates Pendant by Marilyn
Forbidden Fancies Pirate Rocket by Mistress Kay
California Exotics Petite Couture Amorous by Laurel
LELO Mona by Toy With Me
LELO Mona by Joan Price
California Exotics Calla Lily by Rayne
Silent Vibrations by Sammi
LELO Gigi by Juliettia
Oasis Slimline Set by The Countess
Pretty Pearl G-Spot by Mistress Kay
Rabbit Frenzy by Kynky Kytty
G-Ki by Dr. Ruthie
Natural Contours Petite Pink Ribbon by Bailey

Dildos

Tantus Silk by Sea of Neptune
Tantus Silk by Garvenvy
Ophoria Pleasure No. 6 by Elodie
Whirly by Sarahbear
Twista 2 by Toys in Love
Little Su by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
Vixen Creations Tex by Hamilton Hexx
Don Wands Curved Purple Swirl by Screaming Violet
Tantus G-Force by Darling Dove
Fun Factory Bandito by Missy

Anal Toys

Toys for Cocks

Ophoria V-Ring #7 by Red Vinyl Kitty
Fleshlight Vibro Pink Lady by Toys in Love
RingO by Cooper
Tenga Lip Service by Dr. Ruthie
Pirate Booty Stroker by Missy

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult DVDs & Porn

Storage

The Original ToiBocks by Rayne

Miscellaneous

Tantus Big Flirt Plug

2010-06-15T18:48:00.001-04:00

I've been exploring various anal toys for a while now, from plugs to beads to pegging. While I have yet to find anything I truly love, I've been pleased with the experience and keep looking for more ways to add and enhance this experience. I was offered the Big Flirt for review by the wonderful folks at Babeland and had to take them up on their offer. I already had some experience with smaller plugs and this was just the thing to move me up a notch.

It arrived in its plastic Tantus box, folded neatly together and inisde a clear clamshell. I got the black one though it also comes in purple and orange. Like all Tantus products, the Flirt is made of 100% premium silicone. It has a glossy finish and a smooth surface for easy entry. It's firm but pliable and moderately squishy. It's just shy of 5 1/2 inches long, with 4 1/2 inches insertable. The Flirt is 2 3/8 inches at insertion and widens to a nice 4 inch circumference at it's widest point. Made from such high quality silicone, this toy can be cleaned easily with toy cleaner, a mild soap, boiling, or bleaching.

My only other plug, the Bootie, is significantly smaller and can be worn during sex or daily activities. This is not the case with the Flirt. Though it has an appropriately flared base to keep it from being swallowed by your hungry rectum, it is not only hard to keep in, it is a bit uncomfortable to wear when fully inserted due to the round base. However, during use this toy performs very well, the smooth silicone glides in easily and slowly relaxes and stretches you out, giving you some nice sensations as well as preparing you for more and\or larger toys.

One of my favorite tricks to do with butt plugs is to apply a vibrator to the base for added pleasure and since my wife recently acquired a Mystic Wand, that is what I used. The silicone conducts the vibes well, though the tip is small and has no curve to get those feelings where I want them. It does feel ah-mazing as it pulses through the base, though.

I was pleased with this butt plug and plan on using it more in the future so we can experiment more with pegging and see how we both enjoy that. I would recommend this for anyone looking for something a little larger than a starter plug or if you want to jump right in, it could be used as a beginner's toy. Just be patient, go slow and if you don't want it all, don't use it all.

If this interests you or you're looking for something else, check out the great selection of toys over at Babeland!

Stuff of Substance

2010-06-09T12:17:00.000-04:00

I was introduced to substance abuse at the age of nine. Though my dad drinks, he rarely did so. My mother smoked cigarettes for 30 years before finally quitting when I was about twelve. She was on anti-depressants and nerve pills for a while, but I was too young to remember those days. I was blessed with parents who were not strung out, were not abusive. My brother and I were raised by caring parents in a relatively peaceful home environment.

My brother(we'll call him J) started "huffing" when he was 15. For those unfamiliar, huffing is inhaling the fumes of a substance to get high. Paint thinner. Butane. My brother was soaking a rag in gasoline and putting it in a brown paper sack to inhale. My dad found out and they came to blows. Dad kicked him out. Minutes later my father drove down the road and picked him up. He immediately enrolled him in a rehabilitation clinic to try to help him clean up. In hindsight, my dad has reflected that if he had not tried to be so 'understanding' and just beat his ass for screwing up, maybe things would have wound up differently. I honestly do not think it would have mattered.

After being released from his rehabilitation program, he fell into the same type of crowd. Now he was smoking marijuana, doing mushrooms and acid. This went on for a couple years. When he was 17, my brother's best friend (called M) was shot in a bar fight. Everyone had been drinking, there was an argument. The other guy went to his truck, got a shotgun and blasted M in the leg. J and his friends piled into a pickup and he held his friend's leg in his arms as tight as he could, adding pressure to try to stop the bleeding. By the time they arrived at the hospital, he had lost too much blood. He died soon after.

I know how traumatic this experience was for him. I saw how much it hurt him, how it tore his world apart. I also saw how he dealt with it... or the lack thereof. For nearly the past 20 years my brother has been on one drug or another. He has done cocaine, heroin, LSD, crystal meth, ecstasy, mushrooms, and probably more drugs than I know the name of. He has been in and out of jail, in and out of rehab. My parents have fought for him, cried for him, cried over him. My mother's nerves are shot, she's back on meds. My dad has eleven stints in his heart from stress and is ineligible for a bypass. Of my brother's high school circle of friends... five of seven are dead from drug-related incidents.. two committed suicide.

Currently, he is on methadone... a legal treatment for his addiction to oxycontin. Why they call this a treatment, I don't know... He's been on it for years now and the purpose, I thought, was to ween them off of this crap. Apparently, they listen to him when he says he needs to up his dosage. Of course, the reason they do that is money. There's no money in breaking someone from their substance abuse. They'll stop paying you.

That's not the only thing he does. He still does other drugs, plus his methadone. I've stopped talking to him. I see him at holidays, but otherwise I can't stand to be around him. Not because I don't love him or even that I get disgusted by the things he does. It's because I knew him when he was clean. Not only before he started, but he was clean for 2 years before relapsing. That man was my brother. We hung out, played games, went fishing, whatever. When he is medicated or high, he is fidgety, agitated, aggressive. Oblivious to others around him. His lifestyle lost him his marriage and it constantly upsets his two children who now live between mom and dad. No one breaks promises like an addict.

I know he has a problem. We have tried helping him, for years.. and years.. and years. The only person that can help J is himself now. Several people I know in real life, as well as people I blog and tweet with talk about substances they use. I myself drink liquor on occasion. I try hard not to judge people for illegal substance abuse, but given my past exposure to it and the giant gaping hole it ripped into my family... I find it difficult. I have never touched an illegal substance. I do not say this to brag. It's not a badge of honor for me. It's the side-effect of trauma wound... of having a person I love taken from me. He may still be alive, but he's not the man he was or the man he could have been. He was sober for 2 years after being released from a detention center. Those years were some of the best memories I have of him.

Why do people do this to themselves? To their friends and family? It comes down to selfishness. It's my body, it's my life. I'll do what I want to, don't you dare tell me what I can and can't do. It feels good, it's fun. All my friends do it, everyone I know does it!

Maybe it's time you change friends. Maybe it's time you change lifestyles. Do not be so naive or self-absorbed and think that your actions and what you do only concern you and your little universe. People care about you. Some look up to you. Some depend on you. The only thing that hurts more than hurting someone you love... is knowing that you did.

You can't consent to THAT!

2010-06-09T09:39:00.000-04:00

While browsing the interwebs, I ran across this article about a man in Sweden being charged for assault for being in a BDSM relationship. The defendant is a 32 year-old man, his partner a 16 year-old girl. (The consenting age in Sweden is 15, apparently.) A relative noticed bruises on the girl and reported it to the police.

"The prosecutor, Ulrika Rogland, has ruled out rape as the parties are accepted to have consented to their sexual liaison. But the court is set to rule on the issue of where the legal limits lie with regards to violence inflicted on another human being, even if they agree to it."

While I understand the reaction from the girl's relative (though extreme), the proper recourse would be to talk to the girl about her relationship with the defendant. Still, at such a young age it was probably more of a "I know what's best for you" attitude. I'm trying not to freak out about the girl's age, as it is a cultural difference, but I just don't see what the hell a 32-year old man is doing with someone so young.

Aside from that, what the court is trying to establish could begin a dangerous precedent on what you are allowed to do in your own bedroom... and what you are capable of consenting to.

e[lust] #15

2010-06-08T18:25:00.000-04:00

Photo courtesy of Sexy Tiger X

Welcome to e[lust] - Your source for sexual intelligence and inspirations of lust from the smartest & sexiest bloggers! Whether you’re looking for hot steamy smut, thought-provoking opinions or expert information, you’re going to find it here. Want to be included in e[lust] #16? Start with the rules, check out the schedule in the site’s sidebar and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Week’s Top Three Posts ~

Evolution – Open Marriage, Swinging, & Polyamory - Do we REALLY believe that there is one love for us? Do we really believe there’s one cock or pussy to fuck for the rest of our life?

Sweet To Taste - “I’m dinner tonight,” she breathes. “So don’t let me get cold before you start feasting.”

Having a boyfriend makes me feel fat - I know my worth as a person isn’t devalued by my weight – but I can’t get past the notion that my worth as a partner is.

~ e[lust] Editress ~

Fucked by a Stranger - For as long as I can remember, I’ve had this bizarre, twisted fantasy. The roads leading to it were different, but the end result the same: a stranger fucking a very willing me in my bed in the dead of night.

~ Featured Post (Lilly’s Pick) ~

At Her Mercy - “You have been such a good boy today. Where do you want me to put your cock next?” she said with a wink.

See also: Pleasurists #78 and #79 for all your sex toy review needs.

All blogs that have a submission in this edition must re-post this digest from tip-to-toe on their blogs within 7 days. Re-posting the photo is optional and the use of the “read more…” tag is allowable after this point. Thank you, and enjoy!

Erotic Writing

A Taste of Honey
A Collaborative Fantasy
Dirty in all the Right Places
Fuck my face
I miss your cock
I Didn't Think I Was Ready...
In a nightclub
Just can't get enough
Let's Not Waste That Morning Wood
Morning Lust
Nothing Personal, prologue, part one
Possess Me
Stowaway Dildo. Confession #477
The Black Sheets
The Sitter
Waking Up

Sex News, Interviews, Politics & Humor

EdenFantasys: A pattern of deception
HIV, Lube Quality, and Anal Sex: Scare Tactics at the LA Times
I Bet Nick Cage Won't Eat A Preying Mantis
Interview with Scott Owens of EroticBPM
Reaching a Goal

Kink & Fetish

Another Night of Debauchery
Batteries with a Hook
Chastity and the ensuing Punishment
Differences in Submission
I can feel him punch-fucking me
Patient Griselda
Please hurt me
Please, Sir
Remembrances
Story: The Price (FM/M)
Summoned
The Submissive & My Paddle
Visceral and cerebral
Whippings at the Royal Palace

Thoughts & Advice on Sex & Relationships

Answers with an Agenda 3- Dental Dams
Acceptance
Getting Started – Their Profile
How Swinging Gave Me Confidence
My View on Monogamy
Roxy’s April Visit: Collaring My girl, the Ceremony
Sometimes Simplicity
The Sad Seal Lady & Other Precautionary Tales
The 4 of Swords

My Pleasure...

2010-06-07T12:11:00.001-04:00

is your pleasure. Or her pleasure, rather, since I am not having sex with the vast majority of you (your loss here =p). Of course this attitude extends well past the sexual. Recently, I read a post on monogamy that defines it as a commitment to the personal growth of your partner and not simply a vow of not sleeping around. I've already voiced how much I agree with that post, but I also want to embellish a bit on my own. I strive to make my wife happy, not just content... for us not to be complacent but to move forward in that happiness. Each day, the challenge is "What can I do to make her day better?" Not just on the bad days or the sad days, but on normal average days or even great days. What can I do to make my partner's day richer, fuller, funner?

I admit that I cannot take this approach every day, but it is a mindset that anyone in a monogamous relationship should adopt to some extent. Both partners, striving for the other's growth and happiness creates a powerful reciprocating effect that can lead to true joy and a lasting commitment.

This outlook may seem jaded to some. I am not so inexperienced or naive to think that our lives are always filled with sunny days and mind-blowing sex. Relationships are challenging, even when it's just your personal relationship with yourself. If you aren't right with you, how can you relate and embrace other people? It only gets far more complicated. At the same time, that's part of what makes these bonds so awesome and strong. Sarah is not just my lover, not just someone to help with household duties and parenting. She is my best friend, my staunchest supporter in whatever I do and the person that keeps me in check when I think entirely too much of myself. (happens frequently..) Together, we've dealt with things I never thought I could handle and we've talked through issues from our childhood and helped each other come to terms with traumatic experiences.

That's what it means to committed to someone. You help each other cope with the pains of life, share in the joys of love and challenge and encourage each other to grow as a person and as a couple.

Pleasurists #80

2010-06-02T17:24:00.001-04:00

via High Gloss Dolls

Welcome to Pleasurists, a round-up of the adult product and sex toy reviews that came out in the last seven days. For updates and information follow our RSS Feed and Twitter.

Did you miss Pleasurists #79? Read it all here. Do you have a review for Pleasurists #81? Be sure to read our submission guidelines and then use our submission form and submit it before Sunday June 6th at 11:59pm PDT.

Want to win some swag? All you’ve got to do is enter.

TabuToys.com Erotic Story Contest Deadline: June 1st.
Vamp Giveaway Deadline: June 1st.
Fluid: Women Redefining Sexuality DVD Giveaway Deadline: June 6th.
How Do You Define Your Sexuality? Contest! Deadline: June 6th @ 11:59pm Central.
Contest: Blue Swirl Real Tip Glass Dildo Deadline: June 10th @ 11:59pm Eastern.
Summer Splash Giveaway! Deadline: June 12th @ 11:59pm Eastern.
Win Ophoria K-Balls Deadline: June 30th.
Win An Amazing Hot Heart Massager Deadline: June 30th.
June’s Sexy Contest: Explore Your Fantasies with KinkAcademy & Dr. Ruthie Deadline: June 30th.

Looking for sexy posts other than reviews?

e[lust] #14

Editor

Scarlet Lotus St. Syr

On to the reviews…

Vibrators

LELO Gigi by Darling Dove
Little Chroma by Joan Price
Symphony Massager by Sammi
Perfect Pet by Sarahbear
Solar Powered Bullet by Alan & Michele
Doc Johnson Decadence Ripples by buzzvibe
Touche Masturazor by HotMoviesForHer Sex Toy Crew
Hello Kitty Pocket Rocket by Sammi
BSwish BNaughty Unleashed by Dr. Ruthie
Ophoria Bliss 3 Mini by Mistress Kay
FunFactory Astrovibe Cancer by Mistress Arabella
Vital Bullet by Dangerous Lilly
Shiny G by Sammi
Love to Love Oh Oui! by Saraid
Vida Internationale Zara by Mistress Kay
Natural Contours Liberte by Marilyn
Evolved Bliss by buzzvibe
DocJohnson Reflections Nirvana by Mistress Arabella
Silk Touch Egg by buzzvibe
Ophoria Bliss 12 by Isabel0329
Oasis Slimline Set by Sexorcism
Bswish Bcurious by Newlyinclined
O’My Naughty Gnome by Missy

Dildos

Lovemoiselle Aveline by Mistress Kay
Jollies Thrust by Kinky Turtle
Tantus Alumina Motion by Toys in Love
Glassgasm Twisted Rose Review by Darling Dove
Icicles Mind Blow-Her by Darling Dove
Tantus Curve by Mystress Lady Evyl
Vixen Creations Leo by Kaijah

Anal Toys

Toys for Cocks

Lube, Massage Oil, Bath Stuff, & etc.

Slippery Kitty by Sammi
Wet Synergy & Wet Synergy + Cool Tingle by True Pleasures
Nuru Gel by True Pleasures
Hot Love by Mystress Lady Evyl
Durex Play Massage 2 in 1 by Joanna Cake
A Bed of Roses by Lila

BDSM/Fetish

Adult Books/Games

Adult Movies & Porn

Storage

BMS Lockable Small Vibrator Case by Juliettia

Lingerie

Women’s Panty Rose by Mistress Kay

Miscellaneous

Some things you just can't measure...

2010-06-01T18:02:00.001-04:00

I realize that statistics and studies are how we like to analyze things. We take 1,000 people from XYZ demographics, ask them a series of controlled questions and make conclusions and take notes on the results. We repeat this process throughout an area, a city, a state or a country and get a result we consider to be "as thorough and accurate as possible". We use this data to support our arguments.

This can work effectively for lots of things. How many cars do you own, how many kids do you have (hell that question can be complicated for some), do you own your home, etc, etc. To an extent, relationships and marriage can be measured this way as well. How many have you had? Have you ever been divorced? However, when we start talking about how healthy relationships are, are they meaningful, did you mature or grow as a person or help your partner do so? No. Numbers don't cut it.

Some relationships are meant to end. Some aren't healthy at all yet people continue to willingly submit themselves to the negative attention and\or abuse that they receive. Whether that's a marriage or an open relationship, or just a fling you see occasionally, how would that reflect on a survey or as a statistic?

I support the idea of a healthy relationship, whatever that means for you, whether its monogamy, poly, open, or whatever. I could not function in anything but a monogamous relationship. Hugo Schwyzer wrote a great post on monogamy and I completely agree with this view on things. I know my limits and my rules. I've broken them in the past and reaped the consequences. I've learned and I've grown with my wife through those experiences. Has our relationship always been healthy and happy, a nurturing and growing experience? No, it hasn't. Relationships are hard. They take work, real work and dedication.

Were we to get divorced tomorrow, I would become yet another statistic to someone saying "monogamy doesn't work" or "we aren't wired for monogamous relationships". However, if you asked me was it meaningful? Was it worth it? This woman has changed my world and my being more drastically and positively than any single person in my life. Put that in your report.

What's in your Erotica?

2010-05-30T00:05:00.002-04:00

I was reading through some free submission erotica on a few websites recently and I discovered something. I really kind of hate erotica plot. Most of the erotica I have written are short scenes that give you the briefest of backgrounds so you know just what's going on before things start heating up, as shown in my most recent post The Sitter. However, I'm interested and looking forward to writing longer stories, at least a full-length short story or novella. To do so, your story can't be all sex (unless its merely a series of short shorts) and must have some plot holding it together.

I'm going to do some more perusing, but thus far I have come across mind-jarring dialogue such as...

“What doest thou mean to do with me, defile me? I only wish to be taken to York, for I have an uncle there. He will pay you if thou help me, but not if thou savage me.”

I realize this is akin to me disliking a porn for its script, however, when I read something I expect more... Not being a published author of any kind, I don't have much room to talk but for my personal preference. However, if I ever write something like this... someone... please tell me.

Do you like plot in your porn? In your erotica? Can you stomach badly written or scripted material?

The story I intend to write should be just as engrossing as a creative work as it is as a sexual work. I guess that's my point in this rant. I need sleep.

The Sitter

2010-05-28T23:45:00.004-04:00

"Welcome back, Mrs. Jones. Did you guys have fun?" Claudia finished washing the few dishes from supper as the couple came in the door.

"Oh, it was all right. Too much blood and gore for me. I picked the restaurant so David chose the movie. The lobster was worth the explosions." Mrs. Jones was in her thirties, a plump woman with dark brown hair. Her green eyes sparkled as she laughed.

"The explosions were worth the lobster, you mean. Swarm is definitely worth seeing. You should check it out." Mr. Jones came in shaking water from his black umbrella. He was barely older than his wife, though he had flecks of silver in his short black hair and goatee.

Claudia bid goodnight to the Jones' as they settled in for the evening. The three kids were already tucked in and snoozing soundly upstairs. They always paid her upfront so there was really no use in lingering around. Of her clients, this couple was her favorite to babysit for. They paid well, their house was nice and they didn't stay out all night. She still had time to go home and study or watch some television before bed. She slipped out the door into the cool rain.

The slow drizzle turned into a downpour as she approached her car, the fat drops plastering her short auburn hair to her face and soaking through her t-shirt. The wet fabric clung to her skin, hugging her breasts. She had forgotten her bra in the rush to class this morning and her nipples were poking through her shirt. She finally reached her car, scrambling for the keys to get a reprieve from the weather.

Shit! I left the keys on the counter in the kitchen.

She ran as fast as she dared across the slick grass and dashed inside without knocking. The storm increased its assault, the rain coming down in sheets as she shut the door. She walked into the kitchen, retrieving the keys and peeking out the window. She couldn't see more than a few feet outside before her vision was blinded by the curtain of rainfall. Claudia sighed and retrieved a towel from the laundry room, drying her hair and body as best she could while she waited for the storm to ebb. She let her mind wander as she stared out at the rain.

Crack!

The sharp sound of a slap startled Claudia out of her daze. A muffled cry came from the Jones' bedroom. Her hands stopped toweling her hair as she eased forward, nerves on end. She shouldn't be doing this. It was none of her business, but she couldn't stop herself. She had to at least check on Mrs. Jones before she left. If things were bad, she'd leave and call the police. Claudia eased up to the bedroom door and cracked it open to peek inside.

Mrs. Jones was naked, lashed to their giant bed with leather straps. She was on her knees, her ass in the air. She was a full figured woman, her hips curvaceous and her breasts large and beautiful. Her husband knelt behind her, stripped down to his waist. His chest was smooth and tanned by the sun. His dark brown eyes had a hungry look in them and he drank up the vision of his lover before him, his hands tracing the curve of her hips. He walked his fingers slowly up the small of her back, her ass arching towards him at the touch. Claudia felt her face heat at catching the couple in such an intimate way.

Smack!

A black leather paddle slapped against her ass, making a crisp sound as it marked her flesh with a pink flourish. A soft moan escaped her lips and she bit the bottom one as she savored the flash of pleasure. Mr. Jones tickled and teased down her back, letting the soft tassels hanging from the handle of his paddle caress her silky skin. He let them drop between her thighs and gently swung them against her lips. She let out a sigh as they brushed against her pussy.

Slap!

The leather kissed her on her thigh and her whole body shivered at its touch. Mrs. Jones wiggled her ass and rubbed her pussy against her husband.

"How long are you going to make me wait?"

His answer came in the form of another stinging blow. Mrs. Jones' face flushed with pleasure as another moan left her lips. Crack! She shivered under the wave of sensations, that perfect mixture of pleasure and pain. Crack! He was swinging harder, she was moaning louder. Crack! Her ass and thighs were splotchy from the bite of leather, her legs shaking from excitement and bliss.

Claudia slid to her knees as she watched the lovers engaged, her own cheeks flushed as her hands slid under her skirt between her wet thighs, pulling her drenched panties aside so her eager fingers could find her swollen clit. She bit her cheek to hold in the sound as she ground herself against her hand, holding herself up with the other hand as she peeked in at the couple. She closed her eyes as she massaged herself, squeezing her lips and rubbing her cunt, her hand slick with her own hot juices. A gasp slipped out as she stroked hard against her throbbing clit and her eyes popped open in surprise.

The Jones' were too engaged to notice. Mr. Jones was gripping the seductive curve of his wife's hips, pulling her ass into his thrusts. Her cunt was soaked, even from across the room Claudia could hear the wet sounds of passion as he fucked her from behind. Mrs. Jones tore at the sheets with her hands and moaned as she arched into his plunging hips, her ass slapping against his thighs. Claudia sat back against the wall and spread her thighs, leaning her head against the door jam as she fingered herself. She arched her hips against her hands, fingers working furiously. Stroke and rub, grind and tug, slip in and out of that dripping wet cunt.

"I'm coming! Ohh, fuck me David!" The low, blissful moan that followed sent Claudia over the edge. She was too shaken by her own orgasm to hear Mr. Jones deep moans of ecstasy. It just kept coming and coming, wave after wave washing over her and sweeping her away. Her hands moved by themselves, she couldn't stop herself if she tried. Finally, she drifted down back to reality, her hands slick and wet, still massaging her pussy in front of her client's door. She blinked her eyes open and peeked back into the bedroom.

Oh hell! He's coming this way!

Mr. Jones was coming towards her! She clambered to her feet and rushed out the door, not bothering to even shut it on the way out. She didn't know if they had seen her, but she knew that would be the last time she saw them.

Featured Game: Swapper Lingerie

2010-05-28T10:27:00.019-04:00

One of my guilty pleasures is hentai. Hentai movies, hentai games, hentai pictures.. I've always had a thing for them, hentai games especially. Below is a puzzle game - a slider puzzle featuring some nice hentai shots that gets progressively harder. I like the puzzle games because while your trying to figure out how to put it all back together, you begin to realize what the picture is... at least on some of the harder ones. The earlier ones are rather easy. =p
Note: This game was linked from Games of Desire, however I would spare you some of their spam and ads.

Enjoy the game!

Pussy Prejudice?

2010-05-27T11:19:00.001-04:00

This came across my twit-prompter courtesy of Britni and as it was centered around Liberator, I had to check it out. The blog is an article written about how disgusting and awful it is to be surprised by a woman's pussy. He uses derogatory language and terms such as "sushi queen" to point out things he finds offensive, which include larger labia lips, pubic hair, scent and\or flavor. What the hell? This guy gets laid?

He refers to himself as a "love artist" which totally makes me think of Mystery (that strange guy who thought fuzzy hats and binoculars were accessories) but shows very quickly that he doesn't know a thing about women. He criticizes things that are very natural on any woman and tries to justify himself by saying "Yeah, guys should clean their penis too." The things he says are the equivalent to a woman laughing at him because his cock is too small, or curved, or his balls are too big. Maybe his cum is too salty and makes the girl puke all over his crotch (not that he totally wouldn't deserve it.)

Another major flaw in his 'love art' is he seems wholly focused on what he wants or what he thinks she wants. Rather than trying to be so suave, he should be focusing on her needs, her wants, and talking to her about what she likes. Of course, I am expecting entirely too much from someone who would think less of a woman because her labia are too long.

I left a comment on the blog itself and encourage others to do so. It's still being moderated at the moment, I doubt they'll even post it. I'm also annoyed that Liberator allowed such a post to be put up on their website. It has marred their reputation, that's for sure.

Update: Apparently, everyone's reaction to the blog post got it quickly pulled by Liberator. As it should be. Most of the important parts can still be seen on Britni's post here.

Tenga, Tenga, Tenga!

2010-05-26T22:25:00.008-04:00

(Imagine that title chanted to a beat for the full effect)

Seems like every time I review something, it's for my wife's blog. I'll have to get some stuff on my own to review so I can get more credibility on my own site, jeez. Anyway, to the topic at hand! I'm a huge fan of self-lovin. I've been doing it ever since my balls dropped, hell probably before. That first experience was life changing. It has been my most consistent habit and vice, a constant source of joy and stress relief.

Ironically, after I'm married to a woman who can satisfy every need, every want, every desire I have... I am introduced to the world of masturbation sleeves... and in the world of male masturbation, Tenga is king. I'm a huge fan of this company and their products. I've tried several varieties and even modified some of them to be more enjoyable for my own personal tastes.

First is the Tenga Egg - the version I received was the Twister. It's a soft silicone cup with textured insides. It's easy to use, easy to clean. All you do is fill it up with lube and slide it over your cock. What you do, how you do it is up to you. Everyone has their own technique, whether its a standard up and down motion, squeezing and pulling, rubbing the tip or whatever! This particular egg is designed to add a stimulating sensation when spun around your cock. I found it worked best by putting your palms on the cup and rubbing them back and forth as if you were to try to start a fire with your penis. The swirling ridges inside the cup feel amazing. It's reusable as long as the material holds out and is fairly durable. It has a LOT of stretch to it so I'm sure it will fit most any guy, not matter how big they think they are.

Next is the Tenga Double Hole. This little treat is a great for someone who wants to try out some of the more advanced technologies from Tenga, without splurging for the Tenga Flip. It features two entry points to two completely separate sleeves which have unique textures, ridges and bumps to rock your world. It's a pre-lubricated toy and is meant for single use only. The variance in texture and tightness is noticeable and very enjoyable and by removing the liner from the cup itself, it can be reused as long as its maintained and cleaned.

Last but ohhh not least! The Tenga Flip Hole! This badass little toy that looks like a gadget out of Star Wars is definitely the next step in masturbation for men. It features some of the most intriguing and stimulating textures of any masturbater I have seen, it's reusable, easy to clean, and probably the most awesome thing is that it allows you to enhance and change your experience by squeezing on different parts of the toy, adding more pressure and suction to your eager cock. It's got a cool design and at a glance does not even look like a sex toy. Well worth the money for any fan of self-love.

Want more information? See my detailed account as I guest reviewed these products on Sexy by Sarah.
Sarahbear's review for the Tenga Egg, my review for the Tenga Double Hole, and my review for the Tenga Flip Hole.

Enjoy guys and happy humping!

Japanese people don't look at porn?

2010-05-23T23:01:00.002-04:00

I imagine that any survey centered around sex would get inconclusive answers, no matter what continent you are on. Even in America, we would not get truly accurate results. People keep their secrets close, even anonymously. However, something as innocent as watching porn? I can own up to that one.

Granted, this is a rather small survey (only 1,000 people, of which only 741 qualified) but even so... Let's look at some of these statistics.

2.8% of men look at porn, while 6.6% of women look at porn? Those lying assholes. I bet that's gel you used to spike up that hair, too.

77% of women had their nipples stimulated, but only 34% of men had any nipple stimulation. Poor bastards. They don't know what they are missing.

Finally, both sexes average 10% in any consumption of alcohol... Keep in mind this is a yearly survey, though the age range is 16-59 and I am not sure what the legal drinking age is in Japan.

Here's the graph for reference, some interesting information. If we were to have such a survey, I wonder what it would say? Are we freakier than the Japanese? I wonder. (Click to enlarge!)

The Voyage

2010-05-22T00:11:00.000-04:00

Fingers wrapped in silk, my eyes drink you in
A vision from behind, like moonlight on the water.
Your curves call to me, like a sea yet traveled
Though I know these routes best of all.

Your warmth envelops me and the sound of you
Makes it hard to control myself, a ship with full sails.
Rocked back and forth on the waves of your passion,
I hold on tight and ride the tide, waiting for the break.

The storm ends and leaves me worn and weary,
For what man can truly tame this raging sea?

New site, new goals!

2010-05-21T14:08:00.000-04:00

Wow! I haven't posted anything in quite some time. Chalk it up to being pretty busy with work and just not feeling like writing anything at all. I spent all day revamping my sites. They are just about how I want them now.

The purpose for all this is I intend to write and publish erotica. Whether this is myself in eBook form or through a legitimate publisher, time will tell. I want to start hosting some erotica on my site as well. I got more ideas bouncing around but I'm drained at the moment. Mainly, just letting everyone know that I have indeed returned to the keyboard! =p

Transgender Generalities

2010-03-07T20:52:00.000-05:00

While looking at one of my favorite sites for Hentai (which I do both for business and pleasure, this occasion strictly business as I am hunting new girls for Sarah's twitter profile) I ran across this article. It describes a situation where an 8-year old boy has been admitted to the elementary school as a girl after expressing discomfort at being treated as a boy. It's the first instance in this particular school system, though a similar instance did occur in a high school. Each time I read anything about transgender children, I have conflicting feelings.

As some of you may know, my oldest child (Mastermind) is 7, turning in a scant few months. This could easily be my kid, he's pretty eccentric. He likes scarves. He wears his sister's tinkerbell wings around the house sometimes. He even said once that he wished he was a girl. How did I respond?

I didn't freak out and say "Too bad! You're a boy, stop saying things like that!?!"

I also didn't say "Okay, well let's get you some girl clothes and you can grow your hair out. We'll start calling you Tiffany. Want mommy to paint your nails? It'll be sooo cute!"

My personal belief is that a child is too easily influenced to decide such things on their own. Saying that, I believe that any drastic reinforcements, whether positive or negative, can harm the child's true feelings and end up shaming them or leading them to believe that I want them to be a certain way. Basically, I think the door should be left open. If after going through more life experiences and at the very least letting their body and feelings develop naturally he still feels he wishes he were a girl, then we'll take the steps necessary to make him comfortable. Kids too often do things for attention or mimic what they see and hear and I would hate to encourage something that was not heartfelt.

I'm sure there are many differing opinions on this topic and I am not the most well versed person on gender identity, which probably doesn't help things. If you have kids, or assuming you had kids, how would you approach this situation?

A Man of Many Dicks

2010-02-23T23:01:00.004-05:00

As one might imagine, after becoming part of the sex blogging community (and sex reviewers specifically) we have acquired quite a collection of sex toys. One of the many categories we expanded to, which prior we had not a single item of the like, is harness compatible dildos. The main reason was because we didn't own a harness and really had no reason to purchase one. We ended up purchasing a harness in order to try out pegging. (We still haven't ventured into that area yet.) In addition to this, we picked up the Tantus Acute and Rascal. The Acute is a slender dildo with a gentle curve for g\p-spot stimulation. The Rascal is a short yet thick dildo, with a slight curve and lots of ripply texture.

As one who is interested and has experimented with some fisting, I found myself in a curious position. Though I do indeed do a lot of stimulation for Sarah with my fingers and hands, I couldn't help feeling a little diminished by the girth of the Rascal. It measures 1.75 inches in diameter, which is 5.5 inches around. As one of the newest, though still awkward, parts of our relationship, I shared these feelings with my wife. Even though it makes no sense (which I admitted) seeing as how I have this fascination with trying to insert my entire hand into her pussy and making her squirm, I felt intimidated by this massive dildo. I think it has to do with the fact that my fingers and hands are still a part of me, where as the toy is a separate object. After talking about these feelings however, I felt them diminish. They were replaced by the feeling I normally get when she gets a new toy... Anticipation. I want to try it with her, use it on her, make her cum.

One of the biggest advantages we immediately noticed with a harness was how natural it felt. I've been using dildos and vibrators on her for quite some time now, but I rarely find an angle that is comfortable for both me and her. Many times, we just switched toys or did without. The harness solves such issues by positioning the dildo in a natural place, anchoring it but allowing it to give and pivot with the motions of your bodies.

The first dildo we tried with our harness was the Acute. I had used it manually before and while she enjoyed it, the experience was totally on another level with the harness. This was my first experience using a harness as well. Awkward at first, those feelings quickly melted away as I became more attuned to her needs. Grinding my hips into hers, feeling the tugs on the dildo as it rocked against me and plunged between her lips. Her fingers gripping the straps and pulling me harder into her, feeling the same heat and passion, the same intense arousal as if I were using my own cock. Her breasts squeezed under my body and her lips locked on mine and I can feel her body shake as she moans in release... Yes, using a harness is so much better than just playing with a dildo. It allows you to stay connected with your partner through touch, kiss, through skin and sound.

The Acute introduced me to how enjoyable a harness could be, but I still had to overcome my hurdle. A separate night, we tried out the Rascal. We teased each other and kissed each other, giving her an opportunity to get worked up. I tested her with my fingers, rubbing her gspot gently and slowly adding pressure. Her appreciative moans let me know she was ready. Making sure there was plenty of lube on the Rascal (it's a big dildo and woah! at the texture) I slowly eased it inside her. That first initial gasp of excitement, her eyes rolling back showed me just how much she enjoyed it and how it filled her inside.

How did that make me feel? I loved it. I love seeing her enjoying herself, whether she's playing with a toy by herself or squirting all over my chest. I release a satisfied sigh of relief and kissed her breasts and neck, holding her as we worked the Rascal between us, slow and steady. The intense texture and fullness gave her a great orgasm in short order and quickly sold me on both harnesses and dildos.

I'm a pretty average guy with an average cock. I'm not concerned about my size, hell, my hands have proven much more versatile tools than my cock. I encourage men to let go of those feelings of self-doubt. I can't bend my cock in a curve or add ridges to it (without piercings that I am soooo not getting) but I can use a dildo that has a stimulating texture or a juicy little curve to it. I'm glad that we've been able to nurture our relationship so that we can find out what we both really enjoy, even if they make us a little uncomfortable at first. I would not miss any chance to make her happy... yet another lesson that communication is key in any and every aspect of a relationship.

How it lingers...

2010-02-12T15:10:00.001-05:00

The mind works in strange ways. Things you had forgotten, had forced from your mind can come back unbidden, unprompted. It can catch you completely off guard and unbalance your entire day.

I know my own personal experience with this has been brutal. My wife and I have both had affairs and I have flashes of remembering the things she said to me and the things I did to her, in both instances. Her affair is more than three years old and I didn't really find out about it until last year. It hurt to find out the truth, hurt like nothing else I have ever experienced before in my life. Since then, memories of what went on three years ago have gradually been washed back to the surface. It's been a struggle, but after talking to her about it, it seems to have subsided. I was hesitant to talk to her about my thoughts, because I know how it feels when she talks about the things we went through during my affair.

My affair was much more recent, not even 6 months ago. We have talked about everything that happened, everything that lead to it. It's been an excruciatingly painful process for her and I have tried to help her through it as best I can. Sometimes, I simply do not know what to say. Sometimes, it catches me by surprise and I come off short. I want her to know that it's not her fault.

Excuses don't work for things like this. There is no 'because' or 'if only' or 'but' in these situations. I own my actions and am responsible for her pain. It is not something I am proud of and looking at my own morals and personal integrity I do not understand myself how I got so far offtrack.

I am thankful that she stayed. I am thankful for her standing by me and having the courage to tell me everything that happened between her and her affair. As painful as it was, it all happened for a reason. Do I regret what happened? Of course. I wish more than anything that I could take such things back. However, the experience has opened our communication (though I still struggle with this) and helped us explore our own interests both in and out of the bedroom, to the point where I feel that I know her better now than I ever have.

On our way!

2010-02-07T20:41:00.000-05:00

Tomorrow morning we'll be leaving for our week up north to enjoy a lengthy stay in an exquisite hotel. Today has been like the day before Christmas, I haven't been this anxious in YEARS! Besides enjoying all that NC has to offer, we'll be lavishing each other with completely uninterrupted attention the likes we have no received in some six years. We're taking all our toys, lubes, and everything!

What exactly are we taking?

We have a dufflebag slap full of our assorted novelties. The Pure Wand, the Eroscillator, the Tantus Rascal and Acute, and the Onye Fleur make up our pleasure objects.

We also have an assortment of lubes, including Pjur silicone, Pink Water and Pink silicone, what's left of our Liquid Silk, Sliquid Organics and some Babeland samples.

We have our Shunga Chocolate Body Paint, Shunga Massage Candle, some aroma therapy oils from Bath and Bodyworks and the Jimmyjame Counter M.

We're taking our bondage kit as well, the blindfold, restraints, paddle and flogger. I've added my Tenga Flip in the bag, too. It's amazing and I plan to write a review on it upon our return.

Last but not least, our Liberator Ramp and Wedge combo. We haven't had much opportunity to play on these yet and I CAN NOT WAIT to try these things out. We added a Liberator shag throe to the mix to make things easier for cleanup. =)

Even if we get snowed in and cannot go enjoy any festivities, I have a feeling we will have plenty to entertain ourselves. We may take a break to post some pictures, if your lucky maybe you'll see some skin.

Til then, happy humping!

Why do men have nipples?

2010-02-06T19:30:00.000-05:00

Google is a constant source of amusement for me. Not only does it help me find great hentai and anime to use in my layouts and wallpapers, but fairly often enough people have searched for something obscure or hilarious that it makes it into the recommended search entries. This has happened countless times about subjects such as the color of someone's poop, Lady Gaga's penis, why parrots puke, and something about unicorn fur that I may or may not have been responsible for. Today, while trying to show my wife that people do indeed think that Lady Gaga is a man, or at the very least hermaphrodite, I stumbled upon 'Why do men have nipples?'

Inspiration struck me.

I am a man. I should be able to answer this question. Of course I can. I have nipples! Why do I have nipples?

Scientifically, (the boring answer) I think that during creation in the womb we pretty much all have the same parts. Based on which chromosomes our parents give us, we begin developing accordingly. Since women need nipples to feed babies, we have nipples to. This same logic applies to the reason why we have a penis (to make babies) and women have a clitoris. We don't just get rid of the part because it loses its function. (Thankfully.)

Did I say we can't use them? My mistake. Check out this link from Wikipedia here to see some info about male lactation, both hormonal induced and natural causes.

Yay for science. Now why do I think we have nipples? That's easy and so much more fun. I have them so they can be pinched, pulled, nibbled, licked, sucked and anything else you can possibly do to these tender little bits. Nipples are often overlooked by men, which is truly a shame. They are pleasure centers and a well timed flick, pinch, or bite can send me right over the edge into a completely unexpected screaming orgasm.

This is by far the end all be all answer. What are your thoughts? Why do men have nipples?

What is a kiss?

2010-02-03T12:41:00.001-05:00

Talking without words. Telling your lover how you feel, how much you need them, want them, crave them. A connection so intense you don't want to let go. All of the above and anything else.

I love kissing. Whether it is a soft, tender kiss or a deep, passionate embrace nothing gets me roused like kissing. When my wife and I were first dating (some 8 years ago) I was pretty nervous. I knew early on that I was falling for her. I could talk to her for hours on the phone, which rarely happened for me. It was so easy. My past girlfriends had been based mostly on a physical attraction and I had little really in common with them. It was so refreshing and exciting to find someone I could talk to without having to reword or paraphrase myself. Her intelligence and wit were stimulating and her sarcasm made me laugh. With all this chemistry, I was hesitant to rush into things and risk messing up my chance with her.

It was our third date and I hadn't kissed her yet. She was probably thinking I was gay by this time, because she had been sending me some pretty strong signals. We were sitting in my car and had been talking for a while before she went inside. It was getting late but she kept hesitating. Finally, I took a deep breath and kissed her.

Every first kiss is a new experience. This was the most passionate kiss of my life. I have no idea how long we stayed there, wrapped in each others arms. My body was on fire and I didn't want to let go of her to come up for air. This was a turning point for us as we soon became inseparable and hardly able to keep our hands off each other.

Kissing is still just as thrilling for me and one of the most intimate acts of love. The soft curve of her lips, her warm breath on my skin, the slow caress of her tongue... it can be both gentle and needy or passionate and frantic. She can tease me with a lick or devour me with her lips. The kiss can set the mood for the entire night. It can tease you before a night out of things to come or add the last bit of comfort after a night of passion. It's both as passionate and graceful as dance, when my hands caress her face during a soft embrace or my fingers dig into her thighs in a steamy session.

I enjoy other kinds of foreplay, anything from spanking, masturbation, watching porn\hentai or just about anything else; but to me, kissing will always be the ultimate in foreplay.

Waiting...

2010-02-01T09:06:00.000-05:00

I haven't been very active this past week. Work has been busy and I just haven't had the time. My free time has been devoured by making plans for next week's vacation and spending time with my family.

I'll try to put out another wallpaper before my vacation and I have an idea for a couple of blogs I plan on writing.

Oh, some pretty awesome news. My first article, called Hindsight, was published on Eden Cafe. I love writing and this is a great outlet for me. I submitted my second article today, hopefully it'll see print soon as well.

In the bedroom, we've begun mastering the Pure Wand. I gave her the first of hopefully many rather intense orgasms with it a few nights ago. I was so intent on watching her face and checking on her that I completely missed her squirting. We still haven't quite got it down but I know more of what motions she likes, so it is only a matter of time.

In mundane news, I finished the prologue to my novel and have about four chapters outlined. The story is flowing pretty well and I am psyched about how easy some of the characters are developing in my head. I'm not trying to rush this project. It's my first book and it will take as long as it takes. I want it perfect.

We've got a lot going on this week, but I'll try to get some things up before we leave for our trip.

Til then, happy humping!

TMI Tuesday!

2010-01-26T19:24:00.000-05:00

1. When you masturbate, how long, typically, is your session and what do you think about (other than having an orgasm)? Normally about 5-10 minutes, however I have drawn it out over an hour before.

2. Have you ever been "caught" masturbating? Once, long ago, by my parents.
3. Have you ever masturbated in front of your computer? If 'yes' was it for your own purposes or for someone's viewing pleasure? Yes, frequently. For both purposes. =p
4. Have you ever attended a group masturbation party? Same-sex or mixed? No, never.
5. When masturbating, as you reach orgasm, do you continue to stimulate yourself without interruption, or do you stop and apply pressure until your spasms subside? Or? Both, it just depends on my mood.

Bonus (as in optional): How often do you use the word "fuck" (or its derivatives) in casual conversation - frequently, occasionally, rarely, never: Occasionally. It use to be constantly, but I'm getting better at culling my curses. =)

Journey to the G-Spot

2010-01-26T15:20:00.003-05:00

Over the past few months, my wife and I have been on a journey of discovery with each other. Imagine you were making love for the first time again. That’s what it felt like for us. It was an amazing time for us and we made the most of it. We spent nights in each other’s arms, talking, kissing, exploring. We talked about what we liked, what turned us on, everything. It was exciting for her to finally be able to open up to me like that.

One of the things we both had an interest in was finding her g-spot. Thus began about a month long journey of research: reading articles, watching videos, and buying different toys. All of the information was helpful in some way, though somewhat repetitive. For those unfamiliar with this, I’ll do a little recap here of some key points. I’ll also describe my own experiences with this, as it is most definitely a trial and error process.

Tips for G-Spot Massage by Hand
1) Keep nails clean, trimmed, and filed. Nothing will turn off a good feeling like a jagged nail in the twat!
2) Don’t jump right to it! Not only is it easier to feel, it feels better if you’re aroused.
3) Use lube. I prefer water-based for this and silicone for sex. It’s all preference, but you want a good thick lube that has some staying power.
4) The classic form is to gesture a “come here” motion inside of her. I would recommend doing this and stopping when you reach the pelvic wall. Some may find this spot further inside or less so… It varies from person to person. Apply slow and steady pressure and listen to your partner. It should feel good and
may give her the sensation she has to pee. This is *completely* normal. Trust me, it is not pee. The biggest hurdle we found was getting her to relax since that feeling prompts and instinct to do the opposite.
5) Once you have identified this spot, play around with it. Apply pressure, slow at first, then harder. Rub in small circles.. Back and forth.. Up and down. Watch your partner and see what she likes. I’ve found slow and deep pressure to be the way to go. I also recommend imagining you are tapping on that inner wall. Increase the speed, pressure and\or number of fingers as desired.

We originally started experimenting with her lying on her back. We had her legs propped up with pillows to the side so she could completely relax. I started using that classic method with two fingers, slipping them slowly inside her wet lips and stroking her inside, pressing softly on the warm muscle inside. I stroked in small circles to cover more area and it wasn’t long before she felt that apprehensive sensation of having to use the bathroom… So we stopped and she did. We continued. This went on for a week or so and as she got use to that sensation she was able to relax more.

One night, we’re trying to do this again using the same method. This time I was just applying pressure to her g-spot, slowly pulling my fingers back towards me and increasing the pressure with each pull. I could feel her pussy tightening around my fingers as she voiced her pleasure. Her moans were beautiful and it took a lot of control not to lose my concentration and keep my rhythm. That’s when it happened.

I kept it up and soon I felt her swelling inside, the muscles and glands contracting and filling so that I felt pressure on the top of my knuckles. I flicked my fingers back, pressing against her and truly making a vigorous “come here” motion. Her voice cracked and her legs shook as a small amount of clear liquid squirted all over the bed. Such a small amount, but such a huge victory for us.

We then made it a goal each night to press onward, determined to see this through. Finally one night, we tried this same technique with her in a doggie style position. One of the biggest issues we faced with her lying on her back was that the motions I need to make with my fingers were hard to maintain, especially with her pussy clamping down like it did. I started the same way I had before, but it was easier this time. I worked her up and I could tell by the way she felt inside she was getting close to an orgasm, but my fingers were still tiring. I curled my fingers around to rub her g-spot and slid them out, then in, like a dildo, but way better. I was in control and could add more pressure or curve as needed.

She bit the pillow, sheets balled up in her hands, her moans loud even through the fabric. I add a third finger and her pleasure intensifies. I add more pressure and she is on the edge of bliss. I stop thrusting and flick my fingers back and forth, feeling her pussy clenching around my digits. Her voice drops an octave as she comes all over me, her warm juices spraying across my chest and dripping down my arm. I am hooked. I have never been more turned on giving her pleasure than at that moment and the sight, sound, and feel of her climaxing was amazing.

We have enjoyed numerous sessions since that night and it remains one of my favorite things to do in the bedroom. We have purchased several toys to use for g-spot play, but none have been able to bring her to the edge the way I can. I kind of like it that way, to be honest. =)

Any of you exploring this area, I have one word for you: patience. It may take you some time to learn what gets you off, but it is most definitely worth it.

Spanking Good!

2010-01-18T21:45:00.005-05:00

One of the more exciting things to enter our bedroom has been a leather paddle. Of all the toys we've reviewed so far, I personally got the most enjoyment from this one shiny, red article. We warmed up to this point kind of slowly. She used the paddle on me first, which was a good idea. In that past, it was rare that she took a more dominant role during sex. It has always been a huge turn on for me when she does.

We incorporated the whole Kink Set we received from Babeland. Wrists bound by supple leather cuffs, my eyes closed by the stylishly comfy blindfold, she had me at her whim. The most intoxicating part of it for me was the anticipation. The build up of tension as you prepare for the next strike, the quick flash of pain.. the rush of pleasure as your skin tingles, sending a shiver up your spine. She never hit me too hard and I never knew when or where the next slap might come. Having her tease and tempt me was one of the most erotic experiences of my life.

We took a break after that night and oh how I itched to get my turn. I think she was nervous about it, but it took us about a week to get back in the mood for that kind of play again. I admired her in the red leather, the sharp contrast against her pale skin was striking and beautiful. I teased her, sliding the paddle against her skin so she could feel the smooth leather.. then a quick flick of the wrist. That sound! A crisp slap, her body arching slightly under the blow. I check to see if she's okay since this is her first time feeling this (and my first time performing as well). Another one, harder, full on the curve of her ass. A low moan issues forth and I am fully aroused. I treat her to the same experiences she showed me and let her indulge in the tingly sensations spreading across her flesh. It was a great night.

I'm looking forward to advancing further down this road. Some additional restraints, a flogger, maybe some different materials and textures. Anyone looking to endeavor into any kind of restraint or pain fetish should observe the basic tenants of safety. Never do anything your partner is not comfortable with and be clear and concise on what that is; communication is very key to making this experience enjoyable to both parties.

Source for photo here.

A New Beginning

2010-01-15T17:14:00.001-05:00

For the majority of our marriage, my wife and I have enjoyed vanilla sex. We experimented with massage oils and some Kama Sutra techniques. We watched some porn and she bought some pretty standard vibrators and we incorporated them into our play from time to time. Recently, however, we went through some pretty painful experiences involving affairs on both our parts. This is some of the most awful memories both of us share together, but a very special thing happened during the aftermath.

We realized how important we were to each other, how much we really needed each other and how little time, intimacy and effort we had been putting into our relationship. I try to be more open with her about what I want and what I need and do my best to fulfill her needs as well. We have pretty similar interests once we took the time to talk to each other about them. The first months after the affairs, we spent most nights just reconnecting. Talking and holding each other, just feeling close. No television, no music, no distractions. This lead to feeling closer than either of us had felt in a very long time and some slow, sensual lovemaking.

Each time we were together was like a new discovery. I was taking the time to truly enjoy and appreciate her body. Every curve, every moan and whimper was exciting, enthralling. She was just as attentive. She treated me like I was a new toy, freshly unwrapped. Her hands hugged my flesh, caressing my skin with an interest I had been longing for. Her lips sucked on mine, her teeth nipped at my neck. She was everything I needed.

Since then our interests have grown and expanded together in several different areas. After much study and patience, I learned where her G-spot was and how to make her squirt. I’ll talk about this more later, but it was one of the most exciting things we’ve ever done in the bedroom. We accumulated some more toys as well as a few restraints and a paddle. We quickly put those to good use and they are easily some of my favorites. More importantly, we continued to get closer and more comfortable with each other. That may sound strange after being with someone for over 8 years, but it is true.

I still have my bad days, when I get reminded of what happened. She still has her days, too. My affair was more recent than hers, so she had more trouble than me at first. She talks to me about it; I do my best to be patient and help her in any way I can.

We’ve come a long way together and though the last road we took was dark and twisty, I have never felt closer and more connected to her than I do now. She completes and fulfills me in a way I never thought possible. I cannot wait to see what’s next for us.